Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion

[h1]A Mechanically Uninspired, Overpriced Zelda-Clone, Which Almost Manages To Say Something… Before It Forgets.[/h1] [h2]Introduction & Premise[/h2] "Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion" is a comedy, top-down adventure game, and basically a bite-sized Zelda clone. It follows the titular “Turnip Boy” as he tries to reclaim the deed to his greenhouse (which happens to be his home) from the local mayor, Mayor Onion. Turnip Boy has been ripping up any and all tax documents arriving in his mail, and now he has to run ever stranger errands for the bespectacled onion to reclaim his home. The gameplay consists of running around, doing errands, which never amount to anything past “take this here and then come back to get your reward”, and occasionally doing a really easy and boring Zelda-like dungeon. [h2]Gameplay[/h2] You can “trip”, this game’s version of a sluggish and unwieldy dodge roll, where your character literally just helplessly face plants in a quasi-dash in any direction with 360 degrees of freedom. You attack by pulling your right stick in any direction, also anywhere in a 360 degree circle around yourself. Items are used similarly to this, by using just the analog stick, as both direction and execution. The combat is sluggish and swinging your sword, or rather jabbing your enemies with it, stops you dead in your tracks for a solid half of a second, killing any and all momentum and at a measly range. The devs were nevertheless so proud of their clunky combat system, that the game features an optional roguelite mode, with daily challenges, that you unlock by beating the main game. [h2]Story (And Some General Commentary On Insincere Storytelling)[/h2] This is the real missed opportunity. Throughout several brisk journal entries and most interactions with in-game NPCs you’ll notice something very quickly: these developers can write! Unfortunately, what could’ve taken a mediocre, sluggish, overpriced game – with about three hours of playtime for 12.50 EUR base price – to a potentially memorable experience, ends up falling flat. The developers, while they can write, are clearly not confident enough in that writing. There are many times where this silly little game genuinely feels like it is trying to say something, before it immediately goes back to distracting you with jokes and puns and sometimes even internet humor references. This game is a victim of the Toby Fox-esque post-sincere meta-irony that plagues a noticeable amount of independent efforts these days. But where Toby Fox, admittedly, manages to say something, past the eye-roll worthy, forced and constant barrage of laugh-out-loud noise, games like Turnip Boy do not stick that landing. At the zenith of anything interesting it tries to say about the human condition, the [spoiler]post-apocalypse[/spoiler] and sentience, it trades what should be a serious impact for an immediate, or nigh-on immediate, diffusion. There is a moment in this game where, in an old, seemingly abandoned farmhouse, you can see two silhouettes of what looks like human beings run into a locked, heavy-duty steel door and close it behind themselves. You have a hint of what happened there, even a generally uneasy-feeling boss fight that creates some brilliant, unsuspected horror at first, but that’s it. You beat the boss and it falls just like any other baddie, and then you leave. This is likely the most emotionally impactful area of the game, which really showcases the writing potential of the team, but even here, in the same abrupt way as those figures disappear behind that heavy duty door, it ends; it is back to business as usual. Even in some of its unserious moments, you can sometimes feel the faint rumblings of serious socio-political commentary or something else more substantial to chew on, but “Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion” never leaves that hermit crab shell, and for every good writing moment, there are two moments of design in other areas that will leave you questioning why the developers put it there. There seems to be a very real clash within this game, between its developer’s authorial voice and its developer’s anxiety to say absolutely anything, choosing instead to lob yet more “lol so random” moments at you, to see if they stick. This “throwing things at a wall and seeing if they stick” approach to writing can be good, but only if you realize that the wall isn’t an impenetrable, safe surface. Instead, the wall is a lot more like a game of Angry Birds: you can throw things at a wall, but do observe if it’s not about to collapse and crush everything below. [h2]Conclusion[/h2] In the end, [i]Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion[/i] ends up largely a mechanically uninspired and diegetically impotent, overpriced Zelda clone with a few funny moments. Maybe the sequel is where they finally find their voice? Maybe one day I’ll play it to find out, though I’m certainly not in any rush after this. [h3]Many Thanks To Snoozy Kazoo and Grafitti Games For Their Efforts! Better Luck Next Time![/h3]