The Bard's Tale ARPG: Remastered and Resnarkled

Слушай сюда. Ты ИЗБРАННЫЙ. Не отворачивайся, не делай вид, что это не про тебя. Про тебя. Ты ИЗБРАННЫЙ из ИЗБРАННЫХ, ты тот самый ИЗБРАННЫЙ, об ИЗБРАНИИ которого ИЗБРАННО шептались ИЗБРАННЫЕ старцы. Ты ИЗБРАН. Тебя ИЗБРАЛИ. ИЗБРАНИЕ твоё ИЗБРАННО, ИЗБРАННОСТЬ твоя ИЗБРАННА, и других ИЗБРАННИКОВ на эту ИЗБРАННУЮ должность нет, я проверял список ИЗБРАННЫХ лично. Древнее пророчество гласит, что в эпоху, когда видеоигры утонут в пафосе и серьёзных лицах, явится ИЗБРАННЫЙ. И этот ИЗБРАННЫЙ - ты, Звёзды сошлись над ИЗБРАННОЙ твоей головой. Планеты выстроились в ИЗБРАННУЮ линию. Все знаки указывают строго в одном направлении: на иконку Steam на твоём ИЗБРАННОМ рабочем столе. Ты должен сыграть в The Bard's Tale. Это твоё ИЗБРАННОЕ предназначение, это то, ради чего ты был ИЗБРАН ещё до рождения, ради чего твои родители когда-то встретились ИЗБРАННЫМ вечером, ради чего разраб вообще выпустил эту игру. Он знал, что когда-нибудь придёт ИЗБРАННЫЙ. Он ждал именно тебя, ИЗБРАННОГО. Бремя ИЗБРАННОСТИ тяжело, я понимаю. Многие ИЗБРАННЫЕ до тебя пытались отказаться от ИЗБРАНИЯ, спрятаться от ИЗБРАННОСТИ, переехать в НЕИЗБРАННЫЕ края, побриться налысо и уйти в монастырь для НЕИЗБРАННЫХ. Не помогает. Пророчество всё равно постучится в дверь кельи и вежливо напомнит ИЗБРАННОМУ, что он так и не прошёл The Bard's Tale. Так что давай уже, ИЗБРАННЫЙ. Открывай Steam. ИЗБРАННАЯ судьба ждёт.

Would be half thumbs. If you're wanting to see the humor, just watch a playthrough. Playing the game was a clunky experience, could've been more tightened up and cut a lot, a lot more fat in many ways.

Hidden gem right here. Loved the dry humor from Tony Jay (narrator) and Cary Elwes (the Bard) and the music you have to save for your playlist.

1000th review is a good review, but cholera and dysentery as well as the mumps and a bout of bubonic plague hath prevented a full review. Tis dated, but tis a good play.

Классный сеттинг

Meh. I would have loved this as a teenager, and I also probably would have enjoyed it a lot more now if I had played it before the remasters of Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance I & II had released on Steam. Given how janky the game can be (holy stun locks, Batman!) I'd rather just go back and replay the Dark Alliance games. I hope you enjoy the game, I'd give it a mixed review if I could.

🏆 10/10 - Still One of the Funniest RPGs Ever Made The Bard's Tale: Remastered and Resnarkled is proof that great writing never goes out of style. In an era where many RPGs take themselves incredibly seriously, this game does the exact opposite. From the moment the Bard starts complaining about quests, mocking fantasy tropes, and arguing with the narrator, I was hooked. The humor lands far more often than it misses, and the constant banter between the Bard and the narrator remains one of the funniest dynamics I've experienced in gaming. What surprised me most was how well the game holds up beyond the comedy. The combat is simple but satisfying, the summon system is genuinely fun to experiment with, and the world is packed with secrets, side quests, and memorable characters. The remastered visuals clean up the experience nicely while preserving all of the charm of the original release. The soundtrack deserves special recognition as well. The tavern songs, musical storytelling, and overall score add so much personality to the adventure that I found myself stopping just to listen. Few RPGs manage to make their world feel this alive and entertaining. Most importantly, the game never forgets what it wants to be: a fantasy adventure that's focused on having fun. It pokes fun at every RPG cliché imaginable while still delivering a genuinely enjoyable quest full of exploration, treasure hunting, and absurd situations. Nearly twenty years later, The Bard's Tale: Remastered and Resnarkled remains one of the most charming, funniest, and most memorable action RPGs I've ever played. 10/10 A legendary adventure filled with unforgettable humor, fantastic music, lovable sarcasm, and enough heart beneath the jokes to make it truly timeless. Sometimes saving the world is overrated. Chasing gold and causing trouble is far more entertaining.

i really like the combat and being able to summon creatures and monsters to help you fight enemy's makes the game so much fun and not feel like a solo ARPG. story is funny and finding new creatures to summon feels very rewarding. being able to upgrade gear and weps is also a really nice touch. Plus being able to play in different styles from duel wielding to 2 hand weps. Would love to see a Bard's Tale 2 someday.