This game does not require a long and detailed review. I'll still tell you as much as I can. Skip to the bottom for the conclusion (aka the reasons why I am not recommending this game).
We received a single free copy on our curator page and I decided to check it out. The simplistic graphics (I glanced over the screenshots) and the description made me think that the creator was going for a Binding of Isaac sort of vibe with Baptize Billy.
Launching the game from the settings menu will put you on the main menu where the music is already quite loud. You have the option to go into the game by clicking story. Once you've actually played through a level, it becomes available through the main menu as well.
Starting play treats you to a little movie that vaguely tells you what the game description does. Guy is sick. He defecates. The result ends up in his hands. Then control of him is put into your hands as you spawn in a tiny level where you can choose wether to play alone or with someone else.
In the first proper level, you're faced with a bunch of discoloured clones of your own guy and they're out to get you. It's a classic "they touch you, you're dead" kind of thing and you have to avoid them or shoot the ol' poop at them to put them down. Crappy theme aside, it becomes clear quickly that the game is severely lacking. Enemies have free movement whereas you're restricted to up, down, left and right but only one at a time - no diagonal movement possible. Flinging poo can also only be done to the left or right as those are the only directions your character can be facing. So in order to take down an enemy that's right below or above you means that you have to move up or down (or wait for them to do so) and then face them and hit that fire button.
Being touched and killed instantly resets the entire level. The only good thing about that is that if you're going to seriously play this game (and I use the term loosely) and fail often, having no transition saves a lot of time. With the mass of enemies you'll face even in the earliest levels, some patience is recommended. Your projectile poop will travel all the way across the level until it encounters an obstacle so you can take out the clones at long range. If you're not confident about taking out stragglers in little, dangerous corners then you should probably avoid them and move on.
You are scored per level and if you care; that score is shown in the Levels section of the main menu.
Very soon you run into enemies that are slightly different from the ones you found at the start. But even these slight variations (movement speed, mostly) really aren't enough to keep it very interesting for long. Like advertised there are some extra mechanics like having a drink and slowing the game down but that fact also does not make up for what the game lacks.
Before I go into the pros and cons, here's a few small things that bother me and speak for the lack of polish of this title.
Firstly, the controls in the set up menu seem a tad confusing. Nothing you can't work with, but it doesn't mention player one or two controls and when I tried a two player game (WASD controls player one, arrow keys number two) I couldn't fire even after changing the control for it before starting it up. Possibly something I did wrong but for a simple title I would have expected and preferred to see an in-game menu for it that looks simple and clearly separates the controls for the two players.
Then there's small details like the volume for the game (sound and effects) being quite loud - could not find a built-in way to change that. Having to resort to the volume mixer of your OS to bring the sound of a game down to other things like (for example) voice chat or anything is a sad reality.
Adding on to that, having your menu soundtrack reset whenever you go to a different page makes the product seem very amateuristic. And that's before you actually play the game itself and see that coming back in the visual and gameplay departments.
Last detail. I've only played a few levels but I restarted the game a number of times because I kept forgetting about small things in it. What I wanted to do is not be forced to watch the intro sequence every time I started from the beginning but apparently this is one of those things that gets paused when it (the game screen) is not your active window at the moment. Just a tad annoying and something that developers should really avoid nowadays: forcing people to watch sequences they don't want to watch (again).
Alright, down to business.
Pro's:
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[*]Two player local co-op, doesn't require mouse if you configure it. (in theory)
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Cons:[list]
[*]Bad in visual and audio departments - ex: only one sound for the attack and an annoying audience sound clip plays when killing an enemy.
[*]Lack of movement options and possible directions for attacks.
[*]Effects and music too loud and without volume settings.
[*]Highly repetitive and downright boring - barely motivates players to get past the first few levels and see if anything new comes up later on.
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Basically, this looks like a tiny test project by someone just messing around with a game engine and paint. Maybe that's what it is. Maybe it's a joke, an experiment to see if people will literally buy anything on Steam (we already know they will, to boost the amount of products in their account) or it's an attempt to troll people. Regardless of what it is, it's a game on Steam and that (for me) is enough reason to check it out and let you know if it's worth your money when I'm given a copy for free.
It is not. It's not worth your money. Not for a dollar, a euro, a yen or anything else. Seeing what you can play for free (ignoring MMO's, by the way) you should almost get paid for installing and playing this. It really is the crappiest game featuring poop I've ever gotten my hands on. I had to wash them for some time after.
PS. There is ofcourse the slight chance that this title is an early project of a fledgling developer with great ambitions and the best of intentions. Thing is, that is not reflected in the quality of the game and the fact that it's been released with an actual price tag on it. To the developer I would say: if you're going to put a game like this on Steam that still needs so much work, put it out for free in Early Access mode so people can provide feedback and you can improve on it before properly releasing it and having people pay for it. Hoping the next title (if this one isn't updated) will look, sound and play better - and be available for an appropriate cost.
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