[h1]Beautiful Sadness[/h1]
[i]Lonely[/i]. This is the first word that greets you when you start [i][b]Pale Cachexia[/b][/i]. Alone in the dark wood. The contrast between forest's spring awakening and "ghostly gloom" of the night, with "rustling sounds of crickets", nocturnal creatures and "ominous howls", the feeling that someone is breathing right behind you while you venture among the endless unmoving trees - all set the mood of the VN right from the start and mark it as decidedly Gothic and Romanticist. With a sense of crippling loneliness and smallness the main character [i]Esther[/i] stumbles through this vast, misty forest in search of a cure for her terminal illness, and finds herself in a gloomy Gothic manor, almost like she just stepped into a dream.
There, in that desolate manor, cut off from the rest of the world, she finds a lone girl, Seina, who's been living in it all alone for years. Delighted that she finally has some company, Seina embraces Esther wholeheartedly and together, they start searching for the cure to Pale Cachexia, while getting to know each other and form deep connection.
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[i]Argent Games[/i] developer is mostly known for their yaoi visual novels, few of which I own, but haven't played yet... sadly. So it happens that Pale Cachexia has been the first one I read, which not only isn't yaoi but, at first glance, could be mistaken for yuri. It will certainly appeal to yuri fans, BUT this is ultimately a story of true friendship and self-sacrifice, selfless loyalty and mutual trust. The girls share the pain of loneliness, of living, grief and deep sorrow, each one in their own way, and the "honest gentle bond", stronger and deeper than anything.
It's a small, intimate story, a slow moving character drama at its core, full of deep melancholy and crippling sadness. It's also truly Gothic and Romantic (as in Romanticism), very haunting and foreboding, oozing with subtle tension and has some genuine horror moments.
There are only two [b]characters[/b], [i]Esther[/i] and [i]Seina[/i], plus one, Seina's father [i]Isaiah[/i], whose story is told through flashbacks parallel to the main story. A melancholic recluse, an eccentric perfectionist and researcher, he's sharply drawn and very memorable even though we get to know his character mostly through his notes and journals while searching for any trace and mention of the cure there. Mirroring between him and Esther was very strong, either as a literary device or perhaps hinting to a deeper mystic connection. Similarly Seina and Esther form a sharp contrast at first. While Pale leaves Esther exhausted and lifeless most of the time, haunted by dark thoughts and insecurities, Seina is a well of boundless energy, positivity and optimism, a very capable, self-sustainable and willful young woman. In comparison, Esther may come off as bland and boring (a fear she's aware of), but that is not a fair assessment. Esther is our point of view character (despite the 3rd person narrative), reflective and brooding; we're in her head constantly, in her honest, intimate thoughts that it almost feels like we're intruding. And things are not so simple and clean as it becomes apparent that Seina's constant positivity might be a defense mechanism and a blanket that covers some deep wounds that never healed. So, although different, the two girls find much in common.
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At the center of it all is Pale Cachexia, simply called [b]the Pale[/b], a wasting away, energy draining illness which plagues Esther. She describes it as not simply tiredness, but "growing catatonia kept frozen in its earliest stage", a parasite preventing her from leading a normal life, a constant weight and "dread of facing another day". Since it's mentioned that there's no cure or a known underlying cause and you can only treat the symptoms, it resembles so much what we today call the chronic fatigue syndrome in its extreme form with some aspects pointing to depression. Her condition, kept sufficiently imprecise, can be very relatable to many people but also triggering. The VN doesn't exactly pose the question, nor it provides the answer, if it's physical, psychological or perhaps spiritual. It simply examines the condition with a great deal of empathy, understanding and insight. I found that the spiritual and supernatural elements, in keeping with the gothic themes, add a certain new mystic dimension and potent symbolism, while remaining vague and open to interpretation.
[b]The writing[/b] is just excellent, very evocative and descriptive in a true gothic and romantic fashion and a joy to read. It's full of subtle details and nuances especially in character interactions. The novel is very compact and just the right length and pacing to never feel dragging. Even little moments of comforting routine like: light chattering during breakfasts, warm tea, cosy fire, the bubbling of a stream, the birdsong, delicate sunlight, a good day's work - all serve to emphasise finding joy in simple pleasures and being in the present as a way to combat the Pale, and maybe even feel for one happy moment a bit of weight lifted. The best part was the use of contemplative silence. The quality of silence changes throughout the story: shy and uncomfortable, easy and comfortable, deafening and tense.
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As I mentioned, the VN has some [b]true gothic horror moments[/b], the kind that reflect the inner turmoil, especially using nature: eerie stillness, unmoving trees, an "image frozen in time, never changing", all mirror the rapidly progressing illness and being frozen in horror; terrifying primal fear of helplessness and control slipping away, a sense of dread and foreboding, a feeling of unsettling pull and being called, blurring of dream and reality; paranoia and anxiety, doubt and fear of abandonment presented as supernatural horror.
There's a haunting forest hiding a surreal Gothic mansion. Tranquil graveyard with ethereal atmosphere and miasmic mausoleum with sinister presence, marking a constant in the passage of time, complete the picture.
And what a [b]beautiful picture[/b] it is. From the UI to the dreamy backgrounds and dynamic sprites, it all forms one very attractive package. Sprites are very expressive, often changing poses and facial expressions (especially Seina). There aren't that many CGs, but I barely noticed cause the sprites and backgrounds are of such high quality and attention to detail that many screens look like CGs. Outside of standard horizontal text boxes, there are also vertical ones for important conversations and inner monologues which I found excellent for focus.
The VN is very atmospheric in no small part thanks to haunting [b]music and sound design[/b]. From melancholic piano pieces to ethereal passages and ominous dark ambient, the music is the epitome of gothic. But what completes this sound collage are various ambient sounds: crackling of fire, prattle of rain, rustling of blankets or leaves... or crickets... howling of the wind...
It's a small VN, kinetic and unvoiced, but one that tells a story rich in pathos, so touching and poignant that it made me cry at the end which... rarely happens. So honest that it can make you uncomfortable at times, dark but with a trace of hope and yet profoundly sad, I cannot find more appropriate words than [i]beautiful sadness[/i].
[h3][quote][b]Reviewed by [url=https://store.steampowered.com/curator/40848670/]Drugoja In The Dreaming[/url][/b][/quote][/h3]
[b]Curator copy via [i]Otome Sekai[/i][/b]
