This game is brilliant. Especially on sale, the bang for your buck in this title is well above average. I'm a big stealth game guy, and Hitman really separates itself from the pack in this genre. The map design, gameplay options, and general vibe of the game are unique and interesting. 9/10, You Should Play It. I enjoyed my time so much I'm actually listing the cons first.
CONS:
- Always online bullenscheisse that doesn't even stop cheaters from populating the leaderboards, not a fan. This is foremost a singleplayer game and I don't appreciate always online ever.
- Elusive target time gating in a 6 year old game is very irritating. I do have the signature suit with gloves now but it took a solid three months with no way to speed it up.
- Buying the correct version of this game is surprisingly challenging! Almost feels like a scam sometimes. Luckily I got it right the first time I opened my wallet.
- Freelancer is interesting in concept but difficult to the extreme even for a roguelike. Let us keep some of the weapons or something, it's wild how much you stand to lose per run.
- Hitman JankTM: NPCs will be suspicious at the drop of a hat, but don't care about huge bloodstains, cameras going down, or anything of that nature. This game series already cares more about NPC behavior than almost any other, but there's still very strange gaps in the logic that don't compute all the way. Odd bugs are also not uncommon.
- Game is brutal on the hardware, in a very weird way. It runs fine in the sense that it rarely lags or drops frames or crashes (rare but not zero!) but it is impossible to have the game running on my laptop and try to do ANYTHING else, no chats, no messages, no browsers. Granted, laptop. However it's rough.
- You unlock 1 quintillion different guns and have essentially zero reason to use anything other than a silenced pistol. I guess it's fine, but eh.
PROS:
There isn't really a need to go point by point here I adore most of the gameplay and panache of this game. The map design, mission stories, side stories, continuity, unlockables, target options, user made contracts, escalations, all have various charm points for my personal taste to contribute holistically to this being one of my favorite games. I intend to 100% as much of this as I can (Freelancer is a major roadblock here). I'm such a fan of the map design in particular I will do an impromptu personal tier list and end the review on that note. From least favorite to most:
Marrakesh: Colorful, calorful, hace bueno hace chingada. This map has a lot of bells and whistles and it is Friction to get in and out of the various locations. I like the idea of the map in concept, but it is crowded and hard to do much with. See Mumbai for a better version.
Hawke's Bay: There's just not much to this one but they actually added a bunch of extra nonsense in this map despite it being a short one, via mission stories and such. The escalation with all the busywork KOing guards puts this lower than it should be, which is unfair but bah humbug.
Colorado: Holy moly where can you go on this map without being seen by someone I feel like I have to KO fifty people if I want to keep the Suit on. The map isn't my least favorite because the mission stories are a lot of fun and I enjoy them more than Marrakesh. I understand if this is bottom of your list though.
Santa Fortuna: I haven't explored every inch of this map it's massive. The bits I have seen are again cool, but have a lot of friction when transitioning locations. It's aight just not my favorite to navigate.
Ambrose Island: So Much Walking. This map's points of interest are freaking miles apart it's actually quite annoying. That's the only real downside though, the rest is a lot of fun.
Carpathian Mountains: This map is so cool. Ever seen Snowpiercer? Still it's near the bottom for similar reasons to Hawke's Bay, not much to DO here.
Chonqing: This map is very cool, brings to mind Virtual Insanity by Jamiroquai. However it's also a pain in the ass to navigate my goodness. Again, haven't explored absolutely every inch but hoo boy it's a job. Just because it's near the bottom doesn't mean I hate any of these maps, I actually do enjoy all of them to some extent.
Sapienza: WHAT HOW COULD YO- shut up the lab is not a fun place to navigate and I despise it. The city is great, the mansion fine, the film set solid, the lab -1/10. I know there's shortcuts to break the virus and whatever but custom contracts also love putting targets down there. Screw the lab.
Hokkaido: Pain in the ass to navigate? All rise for the honorable Hokkaido. Without a certain trick in the morgue this would be at the bottom. Once you solve that problem it becomes a lot better.
Isle of Sgail: Female dog ass map, I swear... there's a deep amount of friction in getting places on Sgail, but being a more recent map it does have a lot of polish and the verticality is interesting instead of frustrating... except sometimes.
ICA Facility: No seriously, for a tutorial map this is amazing. You can do a fair bit here with the limited objectives and unlocks. Decoying the old man over with a coin was my first big "Aha!" in this game.
Bangkok: This is going to sound crazy because Bangkok is very interesting to navigate overall... except the second hotel building where Cross is. Jesus, what a pain in the ass place to go except exactly the top floor. The underground in Bangkok is incredible for gameplay purposes and is solid. That other hotel building... ugh.
Berlin: Hoo boy it's a little claustrophobic at times but Berlin is interesting. I don't adore the club section of the map but navigation here is not as bad as you'd think. Bumps it above a few others.
Dubai: Another one where navigation is not as hard as it appears, except for the damn exhibit section. I got straight up lost in there once, very embarrassing.
Haven Island: The resort is cool. Lots of walking but it's less than Ambrose and the level design here is pretty fair.
Mendoza: The winery is amazing. I really like this map actually, it's got a lot to it and deserves a high ranking. I just like the other maps a bit better.
Mumbai: I've been to Mumbai. This feels like Mumbai. That is both good and bad. No notes.
Whittleton Creek: I've been to the suburbs. This feels like the suburbs. That is both good and bad. Very fun to navigate.
Miami: Crossing the circuit is disastrous for your shoe leather but what a map. The user contracts on this are incredible, I learned you could wear disguises I didn't even know about from the mission stories. Good job playerbase, you cooked with this one, and so did IOI.
New York: The bank is cool. It's got layers to it and is both claustrophobic and open at the same time. Really fun to dart around enforcers and cameras in the lobby while making your way upstairs. Banger map.
Paris: For a starter map there's a lot to this, they actually almost nailed it the first time. I have personal issues with this map due to a certain escalation but I actually think in terms of sheer layout it's a banger. Solid little stage.
Dartmoor: Oh amazing. It's the easy answer for a reason, I love running around this map in my suit, it just feels like it's made for that playstyle. The stories are cool, the layout is incredible, the various side objectives exist, it's a good time.
Hitman is a good use of your gaming time, it's one of my favorite singleplayer experiences from the past half decade or so, and that resume includes RDR2, Baldur's Gate 3, CyberPunk 2077, and Expedition Verso. I know I just listed four RPGs and Hitman, but I play this game like an RPG I guess whaddya know. Turn off the mission story full guide and set it to limited or whatever, then play it like a puzzle game, Hitman is enjoyed best in that configuration IMO. Still end of the day your decision do what you want, but play this game.
