Hell Miners

☀️

"Hell Miners" is a garbage mobile app that's been dumped on Steam for god knows what reason. Does my gaming rig look like an iPhone to these guys? Anyway this is dumber than Angry Birds, you just use a drag and fling mechanic to punt around a mobile app arena to collect (probably flipped) sprites. What a time to be alive. This is a mobile app... it doesn't matter if this was ported to PC before or after the app store release, or even if this didn't even make it to the app stores. This is built for the absolutely lowest of all gaming platforms and must be judged as such... it's not going to give you a cutting edge PC gaming experience. That alone is enough to disqualify this from any recommendation. We don't spend thousands building gaming rigs so that we can pretend they're iPhones and play iPhone games and mobile apps. The graphics are lacklustre because this was designed for mobile phones, not gaming PCs. Whenever a product is designed to run tolerably on 5 year old iPhones, it's obviously not going to come close to the minimum quality standards that PC gaming enthusiasts except on their cutting edge gaming rigs. One more, mobile devs have made gaming worse for everyone. PC gamers don't spend thousands on their gaming rigs so they can pretend they're iPhones. That alone is enough to disqualify this for recommendation. This wasn't designed for typical widescreen monitors, and, carrying on with a mobile-centric design, it's locked to mobile phone 9:16 aspect ratio. It won't look right on modern PCs as a result of this bizarre decision to publish a PC game that doesn't conform to the standard display form factors. The developer chose not to do the job of a real game developer and create meaningful bespoke levels, narrative based gameplay progression and so on. Instead, they decided that "Procgen IS content!" and lazily tried to use procgen algorithms to create infinite, samey, repetitive, soulless levels, because that's a lot less work. As a result of this poor decision, the game gets tired and repetitive almost immediately. Developers must learn that procgen is a terrible substitute for creating real content. It should not be used as "ez-mode" for content creation, as the developer tried to do here. Now on to pricing and value for gamers. This is "free" enough (not every "free" game in the "free" section is truly free, there's usually some hidden price tag), at least you won't be expected to spend any more money after you download this, but just because something is free doesn't mean it's good, and the cost of a game is more than just financial, your time is valuable too. In terms of public reception, this failed. There's over 130 million unique gamers visiting Steam every month. SteamDB showed the game peaked at [b]only 3 concurrent players[/b]... this is a dismal public reception. This was so bad they couldn't even give it away. Since free games don't contribute to your game collector badge and other profile stuff, is this a worthwhile addition to your Steam library? Nope. This isn't worth downloading. I didn't pay money, but I still feel ripped off.