The “boomer shooter” genre has always been kind of funny to me. Like, just take a look at the most recent [b]Call of Duty[/b] game. The guns and graphics are so detailed that [i]half the time[/i] it looks [b]live action[/b] (at least with screenshots). There’s a full campaign mode and several multiplayer modes, promising hundreds of hours of content. [i]heck[/i], the customization options [i]alone[/i] are just [b]insane[/b]….[b]and yet, everyone rightfully hates the game; probably because Activision [i]sucks.[/i] [/b] And then we get games like [b]Saloonery[/b], dropping out of nowhere on Steam, and people are all like [b]oh my gosh this is so awesome!!![/b] [i]I sure do wonder why that is![/i] Perhaps it’s because it doesn’t cost like $120 on launch day, or that the game is so big that it takes up like 90% of your computer, or [i]that half the game is locked behind DLC paywall, or all the embarrassingly obvious AI usage[/i], or the [b]wildly out of place Beavis and Butt-Head crossover, [i]or that---[/i]you get the point.[/b] But you know what’s the most important thing? [b]It’s fun.[/b] It might not be groundbreaking, but [b]Saloonery is a lot of fun, y’all.[/b]
As you can guess with a name like [i]that[/i], [b]Saloonery[/b] is a Wild West themed FPS game that plays things [i]a little loose.[/i] You’re a nameless cowboy assassin dude, [i]ready to clean up the streets by introducing people [b]to your bullets.[/b] And when you’re finished killing thousands of people who may or may not have been completely[/i] [b]“bad guys”, [i]our town will finally have peace.[/i] [/b] …. yeah, I didn’t play this for the plot. [b]I played it to shoot stuff![/b] The controls should feel familiar right away, as they’re more or less the same [i]for every PC shooter game.[/i] [b]Aim and point with the mouse. Left click to shoot. R to reload. WASD. [i]More letters of the alphabet in a somewhat comprehensive order. [/i] [/b] The guns feel pretty good. You’ve got three classes: one-handed revolvers (which you can carry two at the same time), shotguns, and rifles; [i]all doing exactly what you’d expect[/i], but [b]they’re still rock solid.[/b] And [i]of course[/i], you’ve gotta have some bad guys to target practice on, and the enemies here do [i]more than enough[/i] for that. I was honestly pretty surprised at how smart the enemy Al was; foes duck and jump for cover, and actually try sneaking closer to you for a better shot. Some guards even just stay behind doorways and [i]do a cheap shot to the back.[/i] [b]They’re so annoying…[i]but also complete geniuses.[/i] [/b] While I’ve stated that [b]Saloonery[/b] is just playing the classic FPS hits, [i]I don’t want you to go thinking that it doesn’t have anything of its own.[/i] The fact that you can casually take [i]any[/i] dead man’s weapon is pretty cool; the [b]Matrix-style [i]bullet time[/i] [/b] slowdown mode is really slick; and [i]shooting people’s bullets out of the air is [b]freakin’ awesome.[/b] [/i] But you know what [i]isn’t[/i] awesome? [b]Call of Duty.[/b] (low hanging fruit. sorry) and [i]also these issues here.[/i] The Al is [i]pretty darn smart….[b]except when it isn’t.[/b] [/i] I’ve seen dudes get stuck in walls, jump off cliffs, even a few guys who [i]would just refuse to acknowledge me.[/i] I’d just stand there, face to face with some robber, wait five seconds or so, and then [b]point-blank shotgun his face.[/b] While most of the guns are pretty fun, the most shocking loser of the bunch was the [b]BFG, Big Frontier Gun[/b], which is like [i]some old west style minigun or something.[/i] It...[b]doesn’t feel like it works properly[/b], and just feels unsatisfying. [b]I could mow down fools better with my starter pistol.[/b] Speaking of that, the [b]Triple Tapper[/b] is [i]crazy overpowered.[/i] It’s ridiculously fast and strong, and since it’s a single-hand gun, [i]you can carry two at once and [b]they have unlimited ammo.[/b] [/i] I beat like half the game [i]using only[/i] [b]that.[/b] It’s also pretty odd how the game makes a big deal of its money system and how you can earn money from getting good scores in levels, but then there’s like [i]nothing to buy with said money.[/i] [b]There’s just one shop in town, and [i]it only has two things in stock.[/i] [/b] Final thing to mention, [b]this game is pretty short.[/b] I beat the whole campaign with all achievements in like [b]two days.[/b] sure, [i]it was super fun[/i], but there’s not much else once the credits roll.
On the production values side, [b]Saloonery[/b] is going [i]old school[/i]; looking a lot like an N64 or a DS game, and despite that, or more likely [b]because of that, [i]it looks amazing.[/i] [/b] The environments look both charmingly dated, [i]with blocky textures and sharp corners[/i], but still have some impressive [i]“modern”[/i] effects, like with the dynamic lighting, occasional thunderstorm, or [i]just how big the world looks.[/i] We also have a pretty nice variety in terms of locations; we’ve got the expected desert levels, and then we’ve got things like [i]shooting up a base out in the swamp, dueling in a ghost town[/i], or [b]destroying an entire fortress full of cult members.[/b] And if you [i]don’t[/i] like all the action, you can just hang out in the game’s hub; a cute little open-world Western town, complete with NPCs to talk to and get quests from. The character designs remind me a lot of a [i]very specific meme[/i]: [b]Don Bluth only knew how to draw one man, but [i]darn it[/i], he wasn’t gonna let that stop him.[/b] ...well, [i]actually[/i], he knew how to draw [i]two.[/i] Along those lines, there are only really two kinds of enemy classes here; [i]cowboys and cultists.[/i] And the enemies [i]within[/i] those ranks [b]all tend to look identical.[/b] It’s [i]very[/i] convenient that every person in the game is either wearing a bandanna or a mask; [i]don’t have to draw a single unique face![/i] oh, I forgot to mention, every single character is drawn like a [b]3D[/b] [i]2D[/i] sprite, so they [i]look[/i] flat, but once you kill them, they flop around like a wet cardboard cutout. [b]It’s honestly hilarious.[/b] And the music is [i]awesome[/i], good enough that I might actually listen to the soundtrack by itself. Not everything is at such a high level, as [i]I kind of wish these next things were done a bit better.[/i] The reload animations are pretty wimpy. [i]See[/i], the hands and guns are 2D sprites too, and the reloading is basically just done [i]off screen[/i]; like, the hand just moves down for a second. That feels… [b]rather lazy.[/b] The interior deco leaves a lot to be desired, as nine out of ten buildings typically hold nothing more than [i]the same barrel copy and pasted to infinity.[/i] The “voice acting”, [i]characters just saying [b]yeehaw[/b] over and over again[/i], is funny for like [b]thirty seconds. [i]tops.[/i] [/b] And for a game that’s pretty much only [b]nine levels long[/b], did we really need TWO snowy mountain levels? Sure, one’s fighting bandits and the other cult dudes, but [i]visually[/i], the landscapes feel pretty familiar. Still, [b]the game looks real good[/b], and emulates its inspirations [i]perfectly.[/i]
I haven’t played a “Triple A” game since like 2022’s [b]The Quarry[/b], and while I can respect the effort put into them (if they’re genuinely good), big budget modern games [i]just don’t interest me.[/i] I’m not all that impressed with fancy real graphics. I don’t care about how many celebrities are in the cast. [b]I don’t give a frick about paid cosmetics. [i]And I don’t have the money to pay $80 to $100 every time there’s a new release.[/i] [/b] That’s why I love games like [b]Saloonery.[/b] Mid 2000s, DS and Wii times, where [i]-in my kind of biased opinion-[/i] [b]gaming reached its peak, in terms of pretty much [i]everything.[/i] [/b] It’s my forever all time favorite gaming era, and [b]Saloonery[/b] just hits all the right notes and fits in [i]so well.[/i] [b]Absolute GGs.[/b]
