Saints Row

this is so ahs

only an hour and something in, terrible. hate to say it. terrible.

They killed my boi. They took everything that was fun about old Saints Row and tried to make it situationally funny to me. I am the target audience. And it wasn't. I played through as a British android-woman, camera eyes and all, and that was beneficial because it seemed like she knew she was in a ♥♥♥♥ game. I was playing a character just trying to get through, just as I wanted to just get through, because I love the franchise otherwise. Most of the bugs are fixed, glitches weren't too bad. Technical stuff is whatever, the game is not amazing looking and thus will run on a potato. That's not a bad thing. The bad thing is the writing. I wanted to like the characters, but they're just...stereotypes that are trying to break stereotypes. They're uninteresting and inoffensive...in a series with giant, floppy dildo-bats. I came for giant floppy dildo-bats and got a different kind of slop. Just Millennial jokes while killing hordes of people. I guess that would be okay if the characters sounded more like they cared. That said, there are moments. The guy who wears no shirt trying to sell a guy a shirt. The, uh...what other moments were there? I don't remember any other ones off the top of my head; should tell you something. My main character was in on the joke; she knew it was garbage. But...maybe the others did, too. Gameplay is Saint's Row without the super powers or a lot of the stuff that made it crazy. It feels watered down. Gunplay is -okay-, driving is -okay-. The sidequests range from kinda fine to pure filler; even much of the DLC felt like filler, other than the LARPing thing. The LARPing thing could have been the whole game and it would have been a better game. Your time is better spent replaying one of the old ones.