! That Bastard is Trying to Steal Our Gold ! (2016) by WTFOMGames
The countless voiced negative reviews about this game are ALL warranted to some degree, especially because of its shoddy controls, its boring lack lustre artwork and the constant rehashing of a background texture pack. With the accompanying price tag of $4.50, I tend to agree with the wit of another reviewer who simply typed, “! That Developer is trying to Steal Our Gold !”.
On the flip side however, I actually had some fun with this title. It’s an unforgiving 17 levelled platformer, with 2 of those levels largely being a short animation or tailored scene. While level progression seems all over the place, there is some indication of a logical cohesive forward momentum, largely thanks to an NPC enemy being introduced half way and the realisation that time and effort must have been made by the developer to ensure each level is at least passable though ridiculously challenging at times.
The objective of the game is to make your way through a series of rooms and steal all the gold that’s in them so that the exit portal, which will be the same door which you used as an entry point, re-opens. There will be several obstacles on your venture through such as breakable walls, spikes, and ‘no touch’ dragon fruit like homing obstacles and more.
The title of the game seems to reference that we may in fact be the bad guy who is stealing all the gold from the ‘Lerpikons’. This is a unique suicidal lemming type Leprechaun who constantly throws dynamite in the direction of the player and who moves when dynamite lands within their vicinity.
Made using the Unity engine, this appears to be the second game of this Russian Developer whose real name appears not to be Valentin as he so often prescribes, but really, it’s Petr Petrov. He transitioned to Steam shortly after Desura went bankrupt and openly snickered how easy it was to put poorly optimised products such as his own onto Steam.
While acknowledging its subpar quality, the developer on the other hand has also voiced frustration with the large amount of poster hate he has received and negative feedback which he has micromanaged on the discussion board. This can be quickly chalked to the developer’s immaturity though who tried to emotionally blackmail financial support for his products by falsely claiming that he had brain cancer and that proceeds of his game was going towards treatment.
For someone who claims to be in his 30’s, you would think he would act responsibly and be extremely careful on such a public forum, but alas even in the discussion board of another one of his games I see him irresponsibly jest about suicide if no one buys it.
Peculiar decisions are a constant theme with this developer. Take for instance the fact that he has chosen to use 5 free jazz tracks from Kevin Mc Leod. Why he chose this particular theme, thinking it was fitting to have for a hardcore rage quit platformer is rather odd.
While the game is subpar, it works. It tests you on timing, patience, the ability to plan ahead, to aim while jumping and to collect falling gold. I also applaud the uniqueness of the Lerpikons and their frenzied defensive actions which can be mastered against, especially once you realise that they can be forced to move if you simply get them to throw dynamite where they are in fact standing.
There are several things I thought was missing other than the obvious gruntled complaints from the many of the other reviewers.
1) I thought it would have been a good idea if there was a trophy reward or a bonus section if you were able to master each level using a limited supply of dynamite.
2) I also thought Lerpikon lore was extremely missing here. Since we play as a slender tiny Leprechaun character, maybe we are just stealing back all the gold that the Lerpikons had in fact stolen from us earlier? If this was the case, then maybe we were not the bad guy here as we are led to believe. Will the solitary Lerpikon avenge his friends’ deaths and take back all the gold that was stolen in a sequel?
In final, I had fun, it had a quirkiness to it I liked and while I give the product a barely justifiable thumbs up for those reasons (if you must get it, get it when its on sale). On the other-hand, I give the developers unneeded, unprofessional and deceitful bouts of emotional blackmail a solid thumbs down. I guess like the Lerpikons who foolishly programmed the doors to only open once all their gold had been taken, can only really blame themselves as their own worst enemy. So too, the developer can only really blame himself as his own worst enemy why all his golden sales have been stolen due to his foolish tactics and rants.
https://youtu.be/CAel1VBkw6g?feature=shared
My Reviews: https://store.steampowered.com/curator/6843548/
