Okay so, out of the perspective of a long time Dragon Age and BioWare fan I can honestly say:
I was rooting for this. Through the years, with every negative update and change of direction, I have been there BELIEVING they could make another epic adventure. I TRUSTED the team, I trusted BioWare, even though they dished out games like Anthem and Andromeda, I thought they LEARNED something about us, the fans, and what drew us to their games in the first place. JOPLIN was EVERYTHING we desired from day one, and THIS is what we got..... I stopped having hope from the second trailer onwards. As soon as they changed the title and that Guardians of the Galaxy-esque trailer hit YouTube, I was out. I wanted to preorder this at least twice, maybe even thrice, and I am so ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ glad I did not.
Onto what really broke me after I played it ONLY because it was gifted to me:
1 - Thedas as we know it is burned to the ground, they completely blighted the areas as to not have to regard anything you may have chosen over the last 15+ years. This, lovely reader, is what you get for decade-long loyalty at EA.
2 - Every recurring character from the last game is a shadow of their own selves - a corporate husk that sprays positivity like cheap cologne that never ever criticizes Rook, because you as the player, CAN DO NO WRONG ANYWAY. And with that onward to -
3 - This ♥♥♥♥ is completely on rails, do not let yourself be deceived by the "RPG" tag it tries to squeeze itself into. Yes, you do have dialogue options, but if each and every one of them leads to the same outcome and what you click on isn't what your character actually says in the end, is there really much of a choice? You're Rook, you're positive, you're understanding and what you are first and foremost is.... unproblematic.
4 - Fighting feels pretty and fluid but it turns into a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ of glitching and effects at some point and is repetitive after the 5 hour mark. I can only remember ONE, SINGULAR fight that made me feel something other than complete apathy and that fight still only had 2 opponents with the same three attack patterns they have been using in the phase prior. Everything else? Not worth it. If I had to give anyone playing this one piece of advice it would actually be to just put the difficulty to story or easy and breeze through this whole thing. It is not worth the time you waste.
5 - I COULD say the environments were pretty if, for example, I also did not know that the lore demands the Fade to be a green hellscape where your dreams and desires come back to haunt you and not this lush Disney themepark where trees glitter and mobs only attack you if you touch the right busted elven contraption. I would've loved to see a Joplin with these graphics and with actually good writing we could have had an easy Game of the Year right then and there, no question, but as it stands: it's a pretty, glittery pile of liquid narrative ♥♥♥♥ sprayed upon just about 20 hours of gameplay and cutscenes before you quit out and never want to touch it again. Thanks EA! I am glad I used no money on this.
Oh and also: I killed all of them off, on purpose. It was less fun than I initially thought it would be and way less satisfying.. so even if you think pushing through this could be worth it, if it means you can kill these ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, let me tell you: It really isn't, and the game actively tries to make you feel bad about your once choice by putting in the effort to make the camera pan over their lifeless bodies multiple times AND they make you talk to their disappointed ghosts in a mission that makes absolutely zero sense if you take a second to think about it.
There's a lot of things this game has no grasp on... the lore of the franchise being the most damning one. If you want a game you can play that feels a little more dangerous than Disney Dreamlight Valley, this is the one to go to! Just in case it wasn't clear yet: the villains too were a complete joke. Thanks for reading through my frustrated little rant, I am sorry it got longer than I thought but I had to vent this out after the credits just rolled on me. There's a lot more to write about fyi, but i think the reviews on YouTube pretty much do it justice too. Aight, i'm deinstalling.
